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Prison Hooch

How To Make Prison Hooch!

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How To Make Prison Hooch

Well, what can I say. This is exactly what it sounds like. This is a recipe for an alcoholic beverage that is supposedly made in prison. So yes, you too can brew your own beer(sort of)with little to no monitary investment. This is a handy skill to have if you're for example a raging alcoholic and in a financial bind or just wanna cop a cheap buzz. I have made and drank this stuff before, so not to worry, if you follow the directions and use some common sense, you won't die. But just for safety sake, I take no responsibility for your own dumb ass. If you get sick it's on you. Drink at your own risk. I absolve myself of any guilt. With that being said, drink up and ENJOY!!!!

Materials!

A Gallon Jug
A 3 Pack Of Yeast
Enough Juice Concentrate For 2 Gal.
(In A Pinch) 2 Gal. Worth Of Kool Aid
(In A Pinch) 2 Gal. WOrth Of Sugar (For Kool Aid)

Optional: A Big Balloon

How Do It!

Well, the instructions are pretty easy.
1. Mix up half of the double strong juice in jug. (Having the jug only half full helps to mix in yeast)
2. Add all 3 yeast packets, or you can just guesstimate (it was never made clear to me how much yeast to use. The exact quote is, "As much yeast as you can get your hands on.")
3. SHAKE!!!!
4. When yeast is dissolved add in the rest of the juice concentrate.
5. Top off with water
6. Mix up one final time
7. Let set 3-4 days (WITH CAP OFF!!!!!)
That's it!

Notes!

-If for some reason you are so dirt poor that you can't afford juice concentrate, you can use Kool Aid. Just make it twice as strong, like the juice. I really recommend not using Kool Aid though, it makes weaker booze and doesn't taste as good.

-Try to not have the acidity of your juice too high when you add the yeast. The few times that my hooch didn't ferment, I'm pretty sure it's because the high acid content killed the yeast.

-Also when shaking the yeast/juice mix be careful not to shake it too much, as your yeast can die. Kinda like Sea-Monkeys.

-Your hooch should be ready in 3-4 days. Just don't let it set so long that it spoils.

-If you get antsy and drink it too soon. Be forwarned that God will let you know that you just did a no-no. You'll probably get a wicked stomach ache. Don't worry, you're not dying. It'll pass in a few minutes.

-I would recommend storing your hooch, during the fermentation process, in a place that you don't mind getting messy. During the fermentation process the mix tends to bubble up and this can cause problems.

-Yes, the hooch has a very powerful alcohol smell. DUH! So, if you're planning on being sneaky about this. Brewing in the bedroom is not a good idea. Unless you wanna explain to Mom why your room suddenly smells like Dad on the Fourth of July.

-A balloon can be a handy tool to tell when you hooch is done. Simply slip the balloon over the mouth of the jug. If it fills up with gas, the hooch isn't ready. I'd suggest leaving it on the jug for about 15 min. to really tell.

-At the end of the fermentation process you will notice some sediment in the bottom of the jug. No worries, this is normal. It won't hurt you to drink it, but it tastes like shit. You can filter if off with a piece of cloth, panty hose, coffee filter, etc. Or you can just be carful not to drink it.